Crazy Cullen Wife Swap
by rerelovable16
Summary: What if Emmett cullen had put the family on wife swap? Will Family be able to to handle the new'mom' Please forget the other story i messed up
1. Chapter 1

Thank You Theloveofhate! Because i had no freakin idea on how to upload a chapter and for the advice. So now I hopefully get more understanding on how to write a better story . Yall no who the charcters belong to.

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><p>Bella p.o.v<p>

Right now the whole family is in the living room watching this movie called See No Evil and it's actually pretty good if i must say so myself .Everything had changed over the 12 have some new members of the family. First there's Ty and Nikki, we ran into them while we was in Alaska hunting. They was already vampires but they didnt have nobody but themselves,so Esme being her loving self had almost forced them to be in our family. Nikki has burnette shoulder length and is breathtaking beautiful not only because of the vampire beauty but before she was vamipre she beutiful but the vampire thing just helped her to become even more breathtaking, Ty has short dark hair and he a really amazing dancer. Nikki and Rosalie are alike because they both love cars and almost have same background story except Nikki was abused by her adoptive dad.

Next we have Micheal and Leasha. Micheal is like Emmett and so many ways that we actually think they are lost brothers. Leasha is sorta like me , laid back and don't care about fashion that much. She have long black hair.

Then we have Max and Tanya,Max was dieing at a bridge we have no idea how but Carlise having such a big heart couldnt just leave him. So he changed him. When Tanya came to visited us ,Max couldnt keep his eyes away from for her too. So she joined the family to be with him since he wanted to keep staying with are so happy he wanted to stay with us.

Last but not least, Katte and Garrett and reason, they didnt want Tanya to leave so instead they just joined our family to be with her.

Talk about family love. Anyway we just sitting,still watching the movie when Carlise came through the door from work looking mad.

Carlise p.o.v

I was getting off from work in went to check the the mail: Cars, games, fashion issue magizine, wife swap,HOLD ON WIFE SWAP! who would do this? Two people came to mind .Micheal and Emmett.

I walked in the house to see my innocent (yeah right) children watching something in the living room.

" What is this?" I asked in a calm voice. Ty came up to see the letter and read it out loud.

_Dear Cullens family,_

_We have seen your video and you had been selected to be on wife . and your new wife will be swapped on Wednesday at 12 p.m . Congradulations._

_From: WS Crew_

"Yes! Our video was accepted" Emmett yelled loudly to Micheal as they high- five eachother.

"What's going on in here?" My lovely wife asked coming in from the garden.

" Well YOUR sons, Emmett and Micheal, had put us on Wife Swap" I answer sadly to her. Gosh how I gonna survive without her for two weeks.

"Wait, They said video . What video did they see?"Nikki asked annoyed. Rosalie and her are pretty much alike that we think they are actually sisters . Micheal ran and got the video from upstaris and came back and put the video in.

_Hello my name Carlise Cullen and I submite this video for chance for my family to be on Wife me introduce you to my family . _Camera went to to Edward and Bella on the piano._ This is my son and daughter Edward and Bella .They both seventeen. Everybody thought Edward was gay,but thank god he's not._Camera went to Alice, Tanya,and Kate in the living room doing eachother nails._These my daughters Alice, Tanya,and and Tanya 17 ,Kate 18. They all into fashion._ Went to Rosalie and Nikki fixing on Emmett's jeep._These my daughters Rosalie and Nikki . Rosalie 18 and Nikki 16._Nikki suddenly looked up at the camera to see them recording _If you dont get that camera out my face I will rip your-_ Camera went to Ty, Max,and Garrett playing video games before she could finish._These my sons Ty, Max, and Garrett. Ty and Max 17 ,Garrettt 18._

Camera went to Micheal and Emmett or my new nickname for them dummy #1 and dummy #2._My name is Emmett and this Micheal we are the brains in the family. We both 18 and good looking as you can see , but we have a girlfriends so sorry you can't have these fine pieces of ass._Camera then went to my lovely wife in the garden_ This my wonderful wife that I bang every night in the bedroom, Esme. Aint she a dream . Well thats all of my family . Hopefully you guys pick us . And if this help we are rich , so please choose us and we give you money. _The video ended

Everybody was in silence till Edward broke it saying

"I was never gay!"

" You guys are so stupid! They chose us for the money"Rosalie yelled at the dummies

"Ya'll aint fine asses, Ya'll some dumb asses" Nikki yelled

"Everyone calm down!"Esme said. Everyone had quiet .

'Since they already chose us we might as well go on with it."

After that was said she took my hand and we went upstaris to our room.

Jasper p.o.v

After Carlise and Esme went upstaris , All I could feel was anger in the whole room towards Emmett and Micheal.

"You guys betta run as fast as you can" I said to them

When they did as I said everbody started chasing them .

"NOW I REALLY GONNA RIP YOU BALLS OFF!" said Nikki


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks again theloveofhate and britney10210 for the lol the book people please review if like more story ! Yall know who the charcters belong too

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><p>Nikki p.o.v<p>

After everybody had calm down, thanks to Jasper, we was now doing our own and I was in our room laying down, when Alice came and yelled shopping. I love shopping ! That's the thing Rosalie,Tanya,Alice,Kate,and I have in common. Bella and Leasha don't like it too much. They said they rather read than to go shopping for stuff that we don't really need .Umm.. we need clothes to wear! That's stuff we need! I remember one time they gave me a book to read. I threw that book right outside my window. Hellloo! I don't want to read a damn book. That's why they made school for.

Anyway,everybody except Carlise and Esme,who probabliy banging in their room right now before she leave for wife swap the next day, had to go . Yay! My Ty gets to come with me.

"Alice, why do we have to go shopping with you girls?" Emmett whine

"Because I had a vision that the new 'mom' is expecting to come to a poor shack or something. So since Esme told us to never clean the house are going to buy some new stuff for the house!" Alice said excitedly, clapping her hands together while Jasper and her got in Edward's volvo.

Ty,Max,Tanya,Garrett,Kate,and I rode in our black 6 door Hummer_**(a**_**/n I love Hummers and I was watching Mtv Sweetsixteen when I seen this girl get a 6 door Hummer. Talk about jealous)**Rosalie,Micheal,Emmett,Leasha went in the jeep.

When we arrived at the mall we got everthing we wanted for the house and some extera stuff for ourselves.

"Oh,oh,oh! Look a gold trampoline bed!"Max yelled out

"Why would we need a trampoline bed?" Tanya asked him

" So sex can be bouncy."he said in a duh voice

" Oh! I want one !" Emmett yelled

"No! You want be getting none in a long time." Rosalie said to him

"Babe, why don't you rip my dick off?It be less painful." he said back

" I would be happy to do it!" I volunteer and raise my hand . Tygrab my hand and we follwed the rest as we went into a new store.

Emmett p.o.v.

All of us went into a sex store. Yay! This my favorite store. Too bad I want be getting none in a while. I might buy some stuff for my brothers. That's a good idea! I might buy a plastic cock for Edward and see if he use it on Bella or himself.

Kate p.o.v.

After the mall, we came back to hear something we really didn't want to hear.

"Ewww! Is that ...who I think it is?" Bella asked ,knowing the answer already.

"Let's go find out." Emmett said

So we walked in the house quietly to Carlise and Esme room. We stopped at the door to hear moaning and groaning.

"Ohh Carlise it's so good! Don't stop!" We heard Esme moan out

"I won't dear." Carlise said,then more groaning and moaning

That's when Emmett open th door wide open to see ...

Esme p.o.v.

The door open suddenly to reveal our kids looking at us to see what's going on.

"What the fuck!" Nikki yelled out

"We can explain." Carlise said

"We can explain too, Esme is basically having a orgasm because you rubbing her feet" Garrett said

Everbody started laughing

Maybe this Wife Swap won't be too bad. I could I have a day away from my loving,caring (yeah right ) family.

Nora p.o.v (new 'mom')

I was watching TV when my kids came in the house with the mail.

"Mom, You get to be on Wife Swap!" My child said. Ummm...what's her name?

"YES!" I yelled "Now it's time for a victory clean you guys go clean up the whole house or you grounded for two months."

They went to go clean up the house while I watch tv thinking about how they going to be happy to have me come to there shack and fix their life.

Alice p.o.v.

I had a vision of our new 'mom' all of a sudden. When I came out of it I yelled

"THAT BITCH!'


	3. chapter 3

**Max p.o.v.**

Today was the day of the swap and the girls is upstaris helping Esme pack. They been up there for almost 3 hours.3 HOURS! I mean really what is they packing? The whole bedroom?

"What is taking them so long?" I asked Edward

"They making sure Esme have all the things she needs for these two weeks." he said.

"Seriously! What all does she need? All she need is 4 shrits,2 pants,underware,and shoes because I'm pretty sure they have a washer machine." Micheal said

"Wait you have only one pair of underware?" Ty asked him

"Yep! But most of the time I go commando." he said proudly

"Ewww" Garrett said, wrinkling his nose

"Nope it's less stuff I have to take off when we have sex." Leasha said coming down the stairs with rest of the girls. They all came to sit in our laps.

"I bet Edward wear panties." Emmett said

"This is my last time saying this. I was never ever gay!" Edward yelled out loud

All of us looked at him.

"I'm not to sure about that Eddie. When Emmett gave you that plastic dick, you seemed pretty excited." Kate said

All of us laught. It seemed like Bella just wanted to disapper.

There was a knock on the door . Nikki went over to open it.

"Hello, we the camera crew for wife swap." A man said. When he finally looked up from his clip board he gasp.

"Wow! You beautiful."

Ty growled and got up

"Yes she is even more beautiful when she suck my -"

"Come In!" Carlise yelled coming downstaris, cutting Ty off.

When they walked in thier mouths had drop to floor seeing how beauiful we and the house look.

"Umm... Are you Mr. Carlise Cullen?" The man asked

"Yes"

"Well it time for your wife to going to record your goodbyes."

Esme came downstaris with so many suitcases that I couldn't count them .

"OMG! Did ya'll pack her room" Jasper yelled

" We just packed her 18 outfits and some shoes"Alice said like it's no big thing

"We really have to go so may you please sorta ... hurry up." the man said

"DO YOU HEAR US HAVING A FAMILY DISCUSSION! THE ONLY REASON YOU CHOSE US IS BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU GOING GET SOME MONEY! I CAN SAY RIGHT NOW YOU CAN GET THAT OUT YOUR DAMN HEADS BECAUSE WE NOT GIVING YOU -"

"Nikki!" Esme said cutting her off in a warning voice

Ty put his arm around her waist and whisper quietly in her ear so humans can't hear. The camera people had a scared look on their face.

All of us gave Esme hug and kiss on the cheek after that we helped carry a suitcase to the limo. One final wave goodbye she was gone.

"Umm... you have to leave the house and come back at 3." The man said nervously

"Do not touch anything in our rooms." Rosalie said coldly to them. They nodded. We all left the house, but not before us guys jumped at the camera crew. They looked like they was going to shit in their pants. Good times!

**Nora p.o.v. **

Before the camera crew came I told my family not to listen to anything this new 'mom' says and if she make them do anything that they don't normally do yell at her.

I decided I going to wear my real expensive three hundred dollar outfit I got at the mall last week and I had packed some money too to give to them to have at least a decent meal. When it was time to go I kiss my wonderful husband and my three , I have no idea what their names,kids.I waved at them goodbye before the limo pulled off.

I clearly did that for camera. Now it's time to go to help this poor family.

**Alice p.o.v.**

I just had a vision that the 'mom' was going to give us money for us to have a 'decent' meal. I screamed

I HATE THAT BITCH!

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><p>Thanks for the people who review my story! I had asked someone one could she be my Beta and hopeful she reply back soon,so we going to was never really my great subject, also Please people if you like my story review it! Please with a Edward cullen on top! :)<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for the reviews! Also can someone tell me if wife swap comes on anymore/Thank you! Yall know who the charcters belong too. also Ty is from shake it up and Max wizard of wavely place in case you dont know them :)

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><p>.Nora p.o.v.<p>

When arrived at the house I was suprised about how big and beautiful the house look. I for a fact thought I as going to stay at a tiny little shed or something like that. This must be the wrong house. It has to be!

"Omg! Is the house?" I asked the driver

"Yes" he said back

" Are you sure? Look at the adress again."

"Lady,this the house. Now may you please get out." The driver said annoyed

I walked into the house and was again surprise to see the house spotless and bigger then it looked outside.

"Wow! This house is huge.A little too huge." I said remembering I had to talk

I walked to the kitchen to find the letter the lady wrote for me talking about this family.

_Dear New Wife,_

_Let me start by saying welcome to my home! My husband name is Carlise Cullen,he works at Fork's .I couldn't produce children, so we decided to adopted childern that we call ours. We have fourteen teenager children._

FOURTEEN TEENAGERS

"These people are crazy! Fourteen TEENAGE children."

_Micheal,Emmett, Rosalie, Garrett,and Kate is eighteen and seniors. Ty,Edward,Leasha, Bella, Alice,Max,and Tanya is seventeen and Junniors. Nikki is the youngest, she sixteen and is also a junior. Micheal and Emmett are the prankesters and also as I like to call them 'special' part of the family._

_Kate,Alice, and Tanya are our shop-a-holics of the and Ty is our musicians of the family,Edward play piano and Ty play Is ...Max. He do alot of weird stuff but you probably get use to it soon. Bella and Leasha are laid back and don't really care anything .Let me see, Rosalie and Nikki is sweethearts when you get to know them but at first they going to be sorta(as they like to say)Bitchy at first,so beware. Last thing I have to tell you is they all date one another. Ty and Nikki, Rosalie and Emmett, Micheal and Leasha, Edward and Bella,Max and Tanya,Garrett and Kate,Jasper and Alice. Hopefully you find everything good. We don't really have no rules but not to break anything. Other than that they can do pretty much anything._

_ Cullen_

My mouth was open after I read this.

"THAT'S NASTY! THEY DATE ONE ANOTHER!" I yelled to the camera

Thats just sick.I will definally have to change that when it's time to change the rules.

I walked around the house when I stopped on staircase to see a big family picture on the wall. Wow they beautiful! The girls had jerseys on with their 'pantner' name on it while the boys holding a football.

This can't be them. It's impossiable!They looked like models. They must of copy it from a magazine or something because no one can be that beautiful.

**Bella p.o.v.**

I hate that new 'mom'! After what Alice told us everybody pretty much hate her.

"She should'nt have to worry about giving us money. She should worry about her self with that cheap ugly outifit she got for forty dollars." Alice said

"May I take a picture of her?" Micheal asked

"Why would you want to take a picture of that thing in our house?" Rosalie asked him pissed

"So I can put the picture in my car window as a anti-theft device." He said like its obvious.

"Micheal , that's the smartess thing you had every said." Nikki said smiling

"Really?"

" No! It was so stupid I should beat the hell out of you right now." Nikkk said back

"Ty, your wife have anger issues!" Garrett said

"I don't have 'anger issues',I can get angry just fine thank you!" Nikki groweld at him

"Everybody shut up" Edward yelled holding his head. He look like he was going to shit in his pants

"Ohh, someone pmsing." Emmett said dumbly . Rosalie smacked his head

" It's time to meet this bitch." Tanya said grabbing Max hand and walking out the forrest

I could hear scary music playing in my head as we all start walking out the forest to meet this thing in our house.


	5. Chapter 5 Nora pov

I was still looking around the house and I can say their house is 50 times bigger than mine also they had the most expesvie cars. I hate that! I wanted them to be poor and be beggin for money or something.

I went back downstairs to wait for them to come but i didnt have to wait long.

They all came in through the door looking like people from a runway shot.

"Hello my name is Carlise Cullen and these my children." a blond handsome guy said.

He's going to be my husband for these 2 weeks? I'm starting to like this.

"My name Alice and you going need some new clothes. Don't worry though we going shopping later." A pixie girl said smiling. I ingored her comment

"My name Jasper Hale" A blond boy said with a southern accent.

"My name Edward Cullen" said the boy with messy hair. He look even hotter like that. I would love to rub my hand through he's hair and maybe even other places. He quickly kissed a burnett right beside him.

"Bella. Bella MaCarthy." The girl said who kissed ummm... what's his name . Nappy boy

"Nikki Blue" said a gergous girl said coldly while looking at the boy beside her with his arms around looks made me insecure about myself.

"Ty Cullen" said the boy who have his arms around the girl i was just talking look even more good looking then Edward.

"STOP LOOKING AT TY! HE'S MINE!"The girl yelled when i was looking to long

"hey i'm Max Blue and this my sweetheart Tanya Denali."

"Rosalie Hale and this is my hubby Emmett cullen. Stay away from him." Gosh she gergous

"Kate and this my Garrett"

I nodded. These going be hard names to remember. I will have to think of a nickname for them so i can remember them easily.

"You look a hot mess with that suit " Pixie girl said

"Oh its a suit? I thought it was a dead animal or something." Blondie said

"I have you know this cost 300 dollars."

Everybody laught

" Who ever did that thay rip you off because I seen that at the mall and it cost 20 dollars." the girl who name start with a K (Kate)

" Shut up!" I expected everybody to be quiet but to my suprise they didn't.

"What happen if we don't?" The boy with nappy hair said

" It would be a time out"

"Time out? Lady we too old for a time out ."

I think his name is Max said

"You need a time out for wearing that thing you call a suit." The girl who go with nappy head

" If ugly was a crime you be in a electric chair." Pixe said

"Oh No! yall made the thing upset." Girl who name begin with a L (Leasha)

"Oh, Thats what she doing? I thought she was shitting on her self." The girl who I think is pmsing ( Nikki)

" Children calm down now" The father said. Is that all he really going to do?

Everybody was quiet. Wtf?

**Edward p.o.v.**

I Refuse to be call Nappy Head!

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><p>All I have to say is I Hate school Lol. Review please<p> 


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